back to black

I took a break for a while. I needed it, for both psychologically and physiologically reasons. I also just needed to relax for a while since I was so stressed about everything going on in my life. I did lose a bit of progress, but the scale has been going down the past two days. Regardless, I’m feeling fat and tubby. I took a (much needed) break from the gym, which is also contributing to this feeling of flabby-ness. It’s nice to be thin during the summer, but it’s even better to feel thin during the fall and winter when you’re wearing all those layers. I also think I look better in skirts and dresses than I do in pants and jeans, which is another reason why I need to be thinner.

My motivation isn’t quite there yet. As expected, the caffeine isn’t haven’t the same effect as it used to. The adrenaline from starting school again has also worn off. This has left me feeling mostly tired and lazy… which I sometimes interpret as being hungry. You’d think I’d be better at all of this given the fact that I’m somewhat AWARE of these things, but nope. I’m still hovering around the weight I’ve been hovering around the past few months.

I need to design my plan more methodically and COMMIT to it. My biggest issue has been making time for the gym. I used to be so good about going every day, but now life is a whole lot busier with school and making time for friends/family, etc. I had a goal hitting the gym 5 days per week (no gym on school days), but that quickly dwindled to 4 days, then 3 days, then 2, etc. So I need to figure something out that will work for me.

Today I will stay under 800 calories or so. No gym because I have class tonight.