Down 0.8lbs – which puts me at 121lbs on the dot. I’ve feel a lot leaner and my belly bloat was practically non-existent this morning, which was nice. I’m dying to break 120lbs. Once I do I am not going back. Easier said than done, but I mean it. I don’t wait to keep yo-yoing like this. I wish maintenance was easier. I’ve tried to eat at maintenance in the past, but once I go above 1200 calories I gain and freak out. The scale has such an effect on my daily moods that even if I gain a pound of water weight I get very discouraged and upset. This usually then leads to me “giving up” and eating more. Then I gain more both in the form of water and fat. It’s a vicious cycle.
My body is really tired, but I’ve motivated and I’m going to push through. Today my plan is to eat: protein shake (120), tuna on lettuce (100), grilled chicken (140), green beans (35), small salad with light dressing (100), and another protein shake (120). Not too exciting ha ha, but that’s the reason why I only do this meal plan for 10-12 days. Any longer and I’d go insane! After work I have a bunch of errands to do so I’m going to run/jog to whole foods to pick up some more low-cal salad dressing and then the library to pick up Crystal Renn’s Hungry. I’ve been re-reading Wasted again. I forgot how amazingly good this book is.
On a different note, I’m really bummed the boy I’ve been crushing on hasn’t gotten in touch with me. I met him almost a month ago and I haven’t seen him since so I feel like everything is starting to fizzle out. It’s actually a funny story. I’m a pretty shy girl, especially when I don’t know people or I meet someone for the first time, but when I go out (and have a few drinks) I’m way more confident. So I was at a bar with some friends and I see H from across the bar and I smile and wave like “hey you’re cute and I’m checking you out!” Then two seconds later he walks over and we start talking. We had fun together the rest of the time, but at the end he didn’t ask for my number but we became Facebook friends so I sent him a message two days later. He responded and we went back and forth via Facebook message for a while, although I feel like I’ve been doing more of the question asking than him. I sent him a message on Sunday night and haven’t heard back yet. I always overanalyze boy stuff but it’s really, really, really hard to get a read on him and interest in me. He IS sort of in the middle of moving and getting a new job, so I know he’s very busy. He’s actually moving closer to me which is awesome. Right now he’s live about an hour away. ANYWAY, I hope he gets back to me soon.
Liquid courage! I get a lot bolder with drinks too and am normally very reserved. Maintenance can really be tricky. As far as the boy, I've learned if he's interested he will ask for your number and use it, he'll get in touch with you etc. That's the way it goes. I'd continue to FB message a bit (not toooooo much) and if you feel he isn't responive then back off. He might wonder what happened and come to you. If he doesn't then...there are other fish in the sea!
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